Ammi by Saeed Mirza

A brilliant debut by the master filmmaker. Mirza's narrative interweaves memories of a mother with the living political creed she believed in the egalitarian ethos of a democratic faith coupled with a deep, inquiring faith in religion. The book begins as a letter that contains within itself a vast repertoire of literary genres ranging from the short story, poetry, interior monologue, memoir and diatribe, to travelogue, novelisation and film script. Mirza writes simply and, with a filmmaker's passion for authenticity, he makes everyday events tell a deeply complex story. In 1938, his mother, while walking back with his father from an evening show at the Eros Cinema in Mumbai, casually removed her burqa and never donned it again. This was one of the quietest revolutions ever witnessed.
Indiaplaza Review:
The USP of this book is that it is a mystery unto itself. Even when you are almost at the end of the book, the thought keeps coming back: What on earth is this book actually about? It is a memoir, an essay, a travelogue, a love-story, a film script, or perhaps a new look at history, a fresh perspective on Islam? What? It is all these and more. It is a mind-scape of a man who has a lot of questions that plaque his soul. It is the heart of a man who loves his neighbors. It is the search of a tourist for his beloved in a strange new country. And yes, it is also a letter that stems from the yearning for a mother's presence.
According to his mother, Jahanra begum, a regular letter, with a 'How are you, I am fine... blah blah is a waste of time and effort. A letter should be what one wants to say, and not what the other wants to read. A perfect teaching for creative writing. A perfect parent for an artist to blossom. With this kind of creative license, it is no wonder that Saeed Mirza has laid open his heart, like a long red carpet, for us to trample upon.
At the beginning of the book, Saeed reminisces a little about what his mother was like, the stuff his childhood was made of. And then he takes us one step back. He relives his parents enchanting love-story. There are not many ways in a which eighteenth century traditional Muslim couple could meet, and fall in love, and marry. However, when it does happen, as it did with Jahanara Begum and Nusrat Beg, the intensity of the romance is so deep and so fulfilling that it can lay a foundation for the reader to forgive the writer when he leaves the lovers far too early in the book.
Without much warning, or rhyme, the storyteller turns into a philosopher. A philosopher who has more questions than answers. What kind of country is ours? he asks, when he meets a cab driver who has cut off his long hair to hide from his Sikh identity when the Sikhs were being killed. What is the value of money, he asks, when he turns back and walks toward a tribal couple with a sick child, and gives them a note, not knowing if they would know how to use it even. Whose side is god on? he asks, when a peaceful hilly tribe who once welcomed him and his crew are killed in an avalanche.
But he doesn't always question, sometimes he chills too. He smiles in agreement when a farmer tells his crew to 'fuck off', as he is too busy to give an interview. And then he finds time to enjoy haggling with a salesmen in Turkey over goods he does not intend to buy. And finally the film maker Saeed Mirza does something he has never done before. He asks his wife to click a picture of his, standing with the statue of a Sufi saint. Probably something his mother would have done.
By the end of the book, Saeed Mirza's mother is almost forgotten, the one to whom the entire book is addressed. She is not really the issue, as such. Somewhere down the line, she silently merges with the writer and disappears.
What I didn’t like about the book: Too many questions, thoughts, musings of the author break the flow of the narrative. One cannot continue to enjoy the shringar rasa which the book starts with. Its like the author says, 'Enough daydreaming. Come to the reality.
What I liked about the book: What comes through, without being categorically stated, is Ammi's role as the creator of the artist, the storyteller, the film maker. It is her encouragement, the 'never give up' stance that made Saeed's father a scriptwriter; after failing as an entrepreneur, all because he loved telling stories. She retains her ordinariness, she is graceful and simple, straightforward and strict, she is a lady who dreams.

Interview with the author

1. Q. 1 : I see, in the book, a kind of emerging similarity in you and your mother. Both of you have a keen observation, you look at people's faces. After the India tour, you visit the tombs of the Sufi saints you always admired. You seem to be moving towards simplicity from rationality.
   I am a leftist Sufi. By leftist I don't mean a dogma, I mean my heart is in the right place. It means that I believe in justice and liberty and equal rights for all. These are not just words to me, they carry an immense historical meaning.
   As I have elaborated in the book, I am deeply influenced by the teaching of Sufism. And yes, as you said, this whole search actually points to a very simple outlook in life: the extra-ordinary in the ordinary.
2. Q.2. When you say 'democratic mother', you cite two examples: How she never revealed, not even to her children, the name of the party she voted for, and two, how she accepted all her children marrying outside the religion. This gives me a very intriguing attitude to the concept of democracy. Could you elaborate on this concept ?
   I wouldn't say that my mother was a democratic person because she did not reveal the party she voted for. That is a very superficial understanding of the concept of democracy. To me, democracy is a state of the soul. When you believe from your soul that all beings are equal, you are a democratic person. It has nothing to do with parliamentary democracy and all that stuff. To me democracy is the belief from the depth of your soul that all men are equal, and you can pledge your life to that belief.
3. Q.3. How can democracy be advocated?
   The other part of it is, I believe that democracy is not something that can be taught. It comes to us naturally. Its just a state of mind. It comes from being a decent human being. And most ordinary people I think are decent.
4. Q.4. The structure of your letter is a bit self-deceptive. You begin with memories, then you go into a detailed fantasized love story of your parents and then you leave them and come in yourself. What is the undercurrent that holds it together?
   I am basically dealing with thought processes, with ideas, with memory. I am dealing with all kinds of things. But underlying all that, is my search to find the extra-ordinary in the ordinary. I start with my parents and I end with the conversation with a my old father. frankly, I don't know if it has worked or not, but this was the only way I could contain all that was in my mind.
5. Q.5.You have written a nice and long letter to your mother. Did she write back?
   In a strange way, perhaps she did. The book is dedicated to my father, too, you see. My parents had a marvelous relationship with us. It was a strange relationship that was largely democratic and also very respectful of each other's space. And a lot of love.
6. Q.6. Do you feel a change in your relationship with your mother through writing this book?
   Certainly. This book started with that one phone call that I missed. After I came back from the US, she died the day after I came back. And I did not make that one last call. It's not that that call would have made a difference to her passing away. But it would have given me a chance to say hello. So there was this sense of loss that needed to be healed. There were a lot of other wounds that healed, a lot of anger has evaporated. Writing this book was a great purifying process. It is not just about my mother, you know. I have written about all the people who have touched me in my life, people who have come to me unannounced and unplanned. People who do not make the headlines, people who are the real democrats in our world.
7. Q.7. What was your experience with the process of publishing the book? Did you face any pressure to change the manuscript?
   Well, when I wrote the book I did not bother about the publishing aspect. But after it was done, I realized that writing the book was a spiritual process and therefore the publisher also had to have a spiritual attitude. Which is why, I rejected a very popular publishing house. They were someone with a very good distribution, a wide reach, all that, but when I asked them why do you want to publish my book, I was not satisfied with the answer.
   Finally I published with someone who I felt was in tune with my line of thought, that publishing was as spiritual a process as writing is, and I am very happy with my decision.
8. Q.8. The transition from a film maker to an author. How, did the writer emerge from the glamor of the film world?
   > From one point of view, I think it is a very arrogant move. The history of literature is filled with very incredible thinkers, philosophers and seers. Across time, across the world, it is an incredible range of writers that form the spectrum. How do I dare to join them? It was an incredibly arrogant move.
   Also, I took on the novel as a form. I kind of attacked the form of the novel itself. Whether or not its an anti novel, I know that it is not the standard approach to a novel. I am not saying that I found my style, I am still grappling with it, but this is a beginning. It is something I can start with. This is a path I can travel further on.
9. Q.9. What aspect of writing do you love the most?
   The Solitude in it. The internal journeys. I did not have any parameters to judge myself when I started. I knew that I was not interested in the novel as it exists. That was all I knew. So it was a journey of self discovery. I did not know what the day would bring. I still don't know. But it does give me an incredible sense of satisfaction, this structure that I have somehow cracked.
10. Q.10. And what is the most challenging aspect of writing?
    I don't know, but I think I cannot stomach a superficial response by a reader. If someone says they liked the novel, or didn't like it, I want to know why. I don't mind a disapproval, but I want a reason.
    There was one lady who said that there are good books and there are bad books and that she doesn't know where to place this. I am really upset with this kind of response. This lady, it seems, is a critique of some kind, she has also written a novel, but she couldn't find it in her to confront what I have confronted in my book.
    I know that there is a lot of grappling in my book, and that is because I haven't all the answers. But at least I face my demons and if you don't like that, say so. But the fact is, you cannot say that either.
11. Q.11. What is your next book about?
    My next book is about the dark ages, the so called dark ages of the thirteenth century.